I think we can all agree on one thing: these are some crazy times we are living in.
With everyone adapting to living in a time of COVID-19, Stay-at-Home Orders, and empty toilet paper shelves, we can all say that we are testing our ability to go with the flow.
But, let’s get back to the toilet paper. With shortages all over Florida and the country, you may soon find yourself pondering while on the porcelain throne — what do I use?!?
And as a septic system owner, using the wrong replacement could mean bad news for both your behind and your system.
Toilet Paper Alternatives
Before going into alternatives to toilet paper, we offer these words to live by — do NOT flush anything that isn’t toilet paper. Your septic tank will thank you later.
Moving on, some of these items seem like apparent alternatives, and some may be new unless you spent some time in the great outdoors.
Baby Wipes or “Flushable” Wipes
Makes sense, after all, baby wipes and “flushable” wipes are designed and marketed as a toilet paper alternatives.
So why is “flushable” in quotations? Because when it comes to septic systems, “flushable” wipes aren’t friendly. In fact, they easily clog your system, kill off necessary bacteria, and ultimately damage your wallet from the costly repairs.
So, excellent toilet paper alternatives? Yes! Just toss them in the trash instead of flushing.
Paper Towels or Paper Napkins
They offer the same thickness and basic tissue design. They may not feel quite as soft as their toilet paper counterparts, but that doesn’t stop them from being toilet paper alternatives in a pinch.
Just avoid any that contain menthols or fragrances, which can irritate sensitive skin. And of course, no flushing!
Washcloths and Towels
Before disposable toilet paper came about, there were washcloths. While maybe not the most sanitary sounding, washcloths, and towels can be used instead of toilet paper.
But with the switch, you may find yourself doing more laundry than usual. And before adding them to the washer, make sure to disinfect them thoroughly.
But, be careful of flushing too much bleach and disinfectants down your sink.
Bidets
Skip the toilet paper altogether with a bidet.
Short on space in your bathroom for a traditional bidet? Get a bidet attachment for your toilet.
It’s as simple as doing your business, turning it on, spraying yourself clean, and returning to your day.
Hop in the Shower
We will call this the “poor man’s bidet,” considering most folks already have a shower positioned close to their toilet ready to be used.
It’s the same process as the bidet, but we highly suggest giving your shower a cleaning if it was the toilet paper alternative after a number two…
Leaves
Leaves. Yes, like the ones that fall off trees.
Outdoor folks and hikers have used leaves in a pinch for years. However, we HIGHLY suggest using this as a last resort.
And make sure you aren’t allergic to leaves first.
And of course, never flush them.
So, there you have it. All the toilet paper alternatives you could need while waiting for your local store’s shelves to be restocked.
Just remember: never flush toilet paper alternatives. And as always, wash your hands!